0/ Introduction
Hey, this is P.
Of course this is not my real name, but I prefer to stay anonymous on this blog.
This blog contains by insights, experiences and thoughts, and of course, sharing what is the feeling of “enlightenment” with the world.
I am not a guru; I don’t even grow up with any specific religion background. I found my faith when I was 18, alone, away from home and family. Then I spent 15 years to feel “I don’t belong to the church… but I know I belong to God and I believe Jesus’ teaching…”
So I became a hermit, I don’t really go to church a lot, but I do study bible and even different versions of the Holy Bible, multiple times, line by line, word by word comparison and study.
Then, I realized one very important thing: there are many information that’s layout flat in the Bible, that are completely different from what we see, experience, and been taught at the church. I tried protestant, Roman Catholic and Eastern Orthodox Church. I noticed that their traditions, teachings and the overall organizations are completely the opposite of what’s being written in the Bible.
I stopped going to church, and I stopped trying to have proper conversations with “christians” on theology, because I know at this point, they cannot see past why these organized religion is not the right way; and why they don’t need to be part of the organized religion, in order to believe in God, to have faith.
When I was four, I started to see “little man” in my parent’s home. I chased them, and I noticed they often disappear when my sister or adults showed up. I noticed there are certain luminous qualities in the air, that can only be observed through certain angle, and when you look right into them, there are different things there. Like a reflection of our reality, but they are not our reality. I always know that we can communicate to animals and plants. I thought everyone could do it.
When our dog died when I was around five or six, I saw her, among these luminous qualities in the air, on top of me when I woke up one morning. I told my mom, “Won-won (our dog’s name) is back!” My mom cried, didn’t say anything. I think she knew that I truly saw something, and our dog’s spirit visited us made her eyes all teared up.
For some reasons, all the years past — until a few years ago, I could clearly feel that Won-won was still with me, all the time. I just always knew she’s around, she’s watching out, and she’s trying to comfort me when I was crying secretly because I thought I was not worthy to be loved or when I felt like an outcast.
This feeling disappeared, when my current dog came into my life — but that’s another story.
Growing up, I know there are spirits everywhere, because I saw them, like flesh and blood. Some times they could look and sound so real, that I couldn’t tell they were spirits. I would talk to them on the street, then realized “oh they are not human!” I became extremely scared, and eventually I sealed a large part of my feelings, emotions, and even reduced interacting with people. Maybe because of my ability to sense the energy from different realm, or the fact that I could see things unseen, when the first time that I opened up a Holy Bible and read it in a college fellowship gathering, I just understood everything. Nothing written in the book seems to be weird, or hard to comprehend. One of the missionaries who visited our gatherings told me very early on, “You must be touched by the (Holy) Spirit, because you seem to understand the mysteries that would only make sense if you have the Spirit in you.”
I was not a “Christian” at that time.
Not long after, my friends suggested me to pray to Jesus, and see if he can take away my ability to see the bad spirits and live in peace. After all, even if he didn’t make my prayer to come true, my life just goes on and I lost nothing. So I did. And the prayer was answered. Within a few days, I stopped seeing them, hearing them, feeling them, smelling them… It’s like a satellite reception on my that was connected to different realm was cut off; or, even better, I felt so protected and loved by God or Jesus (whoever answered my prayer!) I knew immediately that no evil or bad spirit can touch or even got close to me. I knew since then, whenever I go to a place, the energy of that room or that space would just naturally be cleansed. Don’t ask me how, but I just knew it. It was later be confirmed when I travelled to Thailand with a big group of friends. We visited Bangkok, Chiangmai and Pattaya, so we moved hotels every few days. We all shared a room with one other person to save budget; and for ten days, my room was the only room that was not haunted, across three hotels.